Article Intro
Trainers are invited to write lessons, tips, and experiences with NVC.
Trainers are invited to write lessons, tips, and experiences with NVC.
When people speak of responsibility within a domination system they often use the term to mean blameworthy or praiseworthy, deserving to be punished or rewarded for what they have done. Although NVC acknowledges a place for the protective use of force, it is incompatible with the ideas of blameworthiness, deserve, and punishment, and seeks to replace a system of retributive justice with one of restorative justice that can better meet the needs of all concerned, those who have injured others as well as those who have been injured.
This requires looking at responsibility in a...
more...A warm-hearted message from NVC teacher, coach and mediator, Lisa-Marie DiVincent, ORNCC co-founder and board member from 2003 to 2010.
Story-at-a-Glance
Long-time NVC “pro” recounts her early Compassionate Communication history, offers encouragement for wherever you’re at on your "NVC path” (or however you would describe it) and suggests some opportunities that might enrich your life.
Greetings from Empathy Cafe, the weekly group I've facilitated in Eugene for the past dozen plus years. I'm happy to say I still love Nonviolent Communication and find it as powerful...
more...Early in September the ORNCC Board of Directors sent a message to the network about the possibility of discontinuing our organization. Most of the responses we received to this message indicated a preference that ORNCC continue. Some of those who responded offered to help support the organization financially or in other ways. We’d like you to know that although a couple members of the board will be leaving the board at the end of this year, several members will be continuing and there are no plans for ending the organization in the foreseeable future.
The board would, however, like...
more...Going to Israel, where I am from, to be with my sister Arnina on her 70th birthday wasn’t an easy decision. These are not simple times for travel. Being in Israel, which I left because I didn’t want to have certain things be done in my name, has only become more difficult over the last number of years. And, based on previous visits, I anticipated being challenged to stay both focused on purpose and open to life.
There are some days I sit in front of my desk for six hours without once standing up and stretching. Likewise, I will go for hours without taking a drink of water from a glass full sitting right beside me. One of my phone apps is a “mindfulness” prompt, a bell that rings randomly throughout the day, a reminder to stop everything, to breathe, to clear my mind of thoughts, and to recenter my energy. I have that app turned off. Even though I know about the value of short pauses and mindfulness, I ignore that practice. Why?
NVC Rising Global Festival May 28th through May 31st
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Have you ever felt confused about the difference between maintaining a sense of mutuality and keeping a score card about who did what for whom in your relationship?
When you are first learning Mindful Compassionate Dialogue (MCD), it is important to learn the five key elements of better communication: observations, thoughts, feelings, needs, and requests. Doing this decreases reactivity, supports self-responsibility, and provides clarity and connection. Unfortunately, learning a new set of skills can sometimes be hijacked by old habits like keeping score.
The most important thing you can do in a reactive moment is to get just a little bit bigger than whatever is happening. To do this, name what you are experiencing by saying something to yourself like, "I feel reactive." Naming what’s happening moves you from the position of experiencer to observer. If you can maintain your position as observer, you will be able to access other skills that you have for managing reactivity.
Earlier this month I posted an article called "Neighbor to Neighbor: One Person At a Time". This was what I considered a "Success" story of NVC creating connection. I am a member of the ORNCC Board of Directors, and we are inviting you to share a story that is a celebration of creating connection through the NVC process. In addition to celebrating these interactions, we are hoping these shared stories will encourage and inspire others. Do you have a story to share? Would you be willing to submit it to me so I can post it on our website and...
more...ORNCC is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization. Your contibutions are tax-deductible. Learn more
Interested in serving on the ORNCC Board of Directors? We now accept applications on an ongoing basis.
I recently felt compelled to print a couple of thousand business-size cards featuring a quote...