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Trainers are invited to write lessons, tips, and experiences with NVC.

Submitted by Gary Baran, May, 2020

Dear Friends of NVC,

From its inception the Oregon Network for Compassionate Communication (ORNCC) has strived to work in tandem with the Center for Nonviolent Communication (CNVC), the international organization Marshall Rosenberg founded in 1984. Having both an international as well as local organizations such as ORNCC has helped draw people to the process we have found so valuable. For many years CNVC has been largely dependent for financial viability on income from International Intensive Trainings (IITs), along with contributions by CNVC Certified Trainers and others in the...

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How to Listen and Find Aliveness in Containment

Submitted by Sally Marie, Apr, 2020
By Lashelle Lowe-Chardé
From Connection Gem

For many, staying at home during this time can be disorienting. It can be more difficult to find a sense of purpose without feedback from coworkers and customers. Knowing how and where to direct your energy can be hard too. Without a consistent schedule, every moment means making a choice. Given that we are greatly supported and regulated by routine and community, finding your own rhythm can be challenging. You still have responsibilities, but how you go about them is completely by your design.

How to Stay Calm in a Pandemic

Submitted by Sally Marie, Mar, 2020
By LaShelle Lowe-Charde
From Connection Gem

As we face these strange times of a global pandemic, it is more important than ever to cultivate calm. Those who become sick or lose loved ones need our support even if it is just holding a calm and caring energy in your heart.

3 Basics to Prevent Collusion

Submitted by Sally Marie, Feb, 2020
By LaShelle Lowe-Charde
From Connection Gem

The word collusion in the context of personal work is often used to refer to agreement and joining in with negative judgments of others. It is often used as a strategy to offer support. But collusion is a costly strategy for showing support. When you are colluding, you are feeding reactivity in yourself and the other person. Reactivity effectively blocks creative problem solving and helpful communication.

Contributing to Emotional Safety vs. Giving Up Honesty

Submitted by Sally Marie, Feb, 2020
By LaShelle Lowe-Charde
From Connection Gem

Contributing to emotional safety does not have to be in conflict with honest expression and authenticity. These are separate things. Imagining that you have to take care of someone’s tender heart by becoming small or giving up your needs is called enmeshment. This is a tragic strategy for relating. Enmeshment is encouraged in systems of oppression in which the person with less power is pressured to not rock the boat, in return sacrificing their authenticity, so that those with more power can stay comfortable.

May You Fall Madly in Love this Year

Submitted by Sally Marie, Jan, 2020
By Rachelle Lamb
From rachellelamb.com/blog

May you fall madly in love this year .. in love with someone who unhinges your tired trajectory, in love with a spouse of several years who might be aching for lightning, in love with demanding children and crazy relatives .. in love with the particular pedigree of genius insanity that has perhaps claimed you in spite of your reluctance .. and certainly in love with an animal, a cloud, a redwood, the wild .. these at least once a day.

The Holidays: 6 Mindful Communication Tips for Peace on Earth

Submitted by Sally Marie, Dec, 2019
By Jay Oren Sofer
From Americans of Conscience

Spending time with family members over the holidays—the season of “good will to all”—often can be challenging.

Family gatherings may reveal a widening canyon of personal, political, and cultural differences; table conversations can halt in tense silence or devolve into explosive argument. Instead of gritting your teeth to get through the meal, here are six tips for more mindful conversations during the holiday season.

Emergency Interventions for Escalating Arguments

Submitted by Sally Marie, Nov, 2019
By LaShelle Lowe-Charde
From Connection Gem

Once the swirl of an argument starts, it’s difficult to find your way back to connection. You might feel angry and scared and want to protect needs for understanding, respect, and consideration. Habit energy can be like a runaway semi truck going downhill. The brakes burn out, and you find yourself sliding into defending, shutting down, attacking, or blaming.

Steps for an Effective Timeout

Submitted by Sally Marie, Nov, 2019
By LaShelle Lowe-Charde
From Connection Gem

You know it’s important to take a timeout when you notice reactivity. Yet, when you come back to try again, you often get caught by the same reactivity.

Submitted by Anonymous, Nov, 2019

Writen by Peggy Smith, Martha Lasley, Sura Hart, Miki Kashtan, Sarah Peyton & Roberta Wall

Context

We have become aware of current situations where certified and non-certified trainers have engaged in sexual relations with participants/clients. We mourn deeply that such situations exist, and see them as part of larger societal patterns of misuse of power that results in serious impacts to others. We are committed to finding solutions that address such issues at the systemic level within our entire community. The only systemic component that exists, at present, is an...

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